Learning Not To React To Your Thoughts

Since I decided to 'blog' about my journey towards becoming a more healthy and balanced individual, it has helped me stay focused in the present moment for the most part.  And living each day in the present is key to staying centered and focused on what's important.  Let's face it, when you have been letting yourself get distracted by the constant thoughts that pop up in your mind over the course of the day, it's hard to turn that chatter completely off.  It takes quite a bit of practice when you haven't done it in so long. There are so many things to think about everyday. We have constant ideas, visions, fantasies, concerns, and worries among other things that our minds have to sort out.  Not to mention having to fend off negative thoughts that can be down right abusive to us at times.  When I wake in the morning during the work week, I have to think about how long it will take me to make breakfast, workout, shower, style my hair, dress, and leave out the door.  Those are the kind of thoughts that are normal during the course of the day.  They help us navigate our time and guide our decision making.  But, I'm talking about the thoughts that tend to slither into our psychie, unannounced and unwanted, just like a goa'uld. Those of you who are familiar with the Sci-Fi series Stargate SG-1 will know what I'm talking about. So, what can we do about them? 

Right now, I'm dealing with getting frustrated too quickly when I have to deal with the sweltering heat and humidity that is taking place in Philly right now. I don't like to sweat. In fact, I hate to sweat! I shouldn't have to sweat like this...blah, blah, blah. That is the chatter that goes on in my mind until I finally get myself all worked up and start to get agitated and frustrated with everything, especially with the heat. That is when I have to just quiet myself and just watch those negative thoughts pop up without any judgment. I need to just 'be.' Yes, sweat might just be dripping down my face from my forehead and my hair on the back of my neck might be getting a little too damp (and is ruining my awesome hairdo) but it is my body's built in air conditioning mechanism that is kicking in and saving me from having a possible heat stroke. Breath in, breath out...ahhh. So, the next time you are experiencing unwanted negative thoughts, don't continue into all that negativity.  Just acknowledge that they are there without judgment and let them dissipate on their own. 

Tough Lesson On Aging...

When we move out of our thirties and into our forties, there are some obvious changes that occur within.  I noticed around forty-one, that I wasn't able to do as much heavy lifting as I used to in years past.  Well, I could still lift heavy things, but I would pay the price that same night or the next morning with a sore shoulder and elbow.  For instance, as a strong, capable, independent woman, I always prided myself on being able to lift heavy grocery bags (we're talking 2-3 heavy bags in each arm) from the cart to my car, from my car up the stairs and into my house.  And whenever a male friend or neighbor would offer their help, I would politely decline their offer.  Feeling physically strong and capable has always been extremely important to me - an essential component to my well being, if you will.  Ever since my early teen years,  I enjoyed taking up aerobics, walking, biking, bowling, and strength training with my brother's weights (when he wasn't around).  I even played in a women's softball league in my mid twenties. While my activities have slowed down over the past decade...some months they've even grinded to a halt due to a continual struggle with a low vitamin D count. There were literally some days when I had a hard time just getting up from a chair and walking into the next room due to the intense pain in my joints. I felt like I was an 80 year old woman (no offense).  But, by the grace of God, I forced myself to go to work everyday and maintained a close to normal lifestyle during that time. Not too long ago, I finished another 50,000 IU vitamin D regimen and I'm now taking 2000-4000 IU's of vitamin D everyday.  Even though my body is allowing me to function at a much better level than before, my resent blood tests determined that my count is still low. I'm grateful that my joints are holding up pretty well with little to no pain most days.  But, my arthritic left knee has put me in and out of physical therapy for the past few months. 

Another fun fact about aging as we reach midlife is that our metabolism seems to slow down.  Even though some people say that it doesn't really slow with age, our muscle mass actually tends to decrease as we get older and our fat tends to inevitably increase. Well, as a woman, I feel that my metabolism has slowed down as I've gotten older. Of course, I'm not as active as I used to be, but I'm working on changing that at present with the help of my good friend Beth. I'm proud to say that she has maintained a healthy lifestyle for over a decade after losing over 100 lbs. on her own. I tend to view her as a fitness fanatic. It sounds like a negative thing, but she is one of those rare persons who gets a natural high from daily burn workouts, juicing, and taking herbal supplements. I love the fact that she is always moving forward seeking out the next physically challenging workout routine to take her to a higher fitness level. 

Let's face it, we all need to feel strong, capable, and healthy, am I right?  If we are lacking one of those three important attributes, we may start to feel a lack of control in our own lives, which can be quite scary.  One thing that is finally starting to sink in for me is that I can still become healthier and even reverse some of the changes that have gone on within my own body.  Anything is possible if you believe.  (It also comes from a deeper and growing faith I have in my higher power - which for me is God). I know that it sounds like a cliche, but it is actually true.  Do some research and you'll find that there is proof in both the scientific and spiritual realms that our mind and body connection is a powerful force.  A force that can be used to heal us and also to bring us to our knees.  So, it is essential for us to 'take captive every thought' and retrain our minds to focus in the moment on the positive.  Since I've been on this path, I've experienced this first hand and you can too.

Unearthing Inner Zen

On my spiritual journey through this life, I've gained some wisdom and perspective along the way that has helped me to reach this turning point in midlife.  I believe that the majority of us want to live a healthy balanced lifestyle, but find it difficult to put into practice.  Many of us fall into the trap of putting so much emphasis on building up our careers that we make light of the fact that we are actually skirting our duty to take care of ourselves and our families the way we should. Others devote so much time and energy into making sure that their children's lives are fulfilling, allow their own personal development as well as adult relationships to suffer.  Don't get me wrong, I think it's extremely important to make sure your children's needs are met on a daily basis and that you are there for them whenever they need  you, but when does your life stop and their's begin? It is all too common for parents (especially mothers) to forget about their own need to continue to grow and develop as a person while raising their children.  Some may even take offense to the fact that someone (like me) would tell them otherwise.  Usually if you have jumped right into a relationship or marriage before you had time to develop on your own as an individual (that means living a single lifestyle on your own and getting to know and like the real you) then 9 times out of 10 you probably have lost or have never known a part of yourself that is an essential component to who you are and is longing to be nurtured.  There are so many other scenarios out there that can be mentioned, but the bottom line is, if you are not feeling fulfilled as an individual, you cannot be living a truly healthy balanced lifestyle.  And that is not okay. 

I starting this blog in order to stay focused on my own objective to live out the second half  of my journey on this earth with consistent joy and balance in my life.  My ultimate goal is to live a healthy balanced life on a daily basis (Zen).  I find that practicing to live in the moment each and every day is one of the essential ingredients to unearthing inner Zen.  To me this also means being honest with myself and learning to accept all of my feelings and emotions as they come up without judgment.  It takes too much energy to deal with regret about what you didn't accomplish in the past or what you hope to achieve in the future.  Stress and anxiety from over thinking and worrying can rob you of present joy and peace and even steal years from your life if you let it.  Unfortunately, I know this from first hand experience (which I will talk about at another time).  There are so many external forces out there prompting us to try the latest diet craze to lose weight or buy the  new cutting edge exercise equipment that costs more money than we can actually afford all in an effort to make us feel better about ourselves.  While it is true that we may need to lose the weight or become healthier in some way, the only way we will inevitably regain our footing (balance) in our life is to quiet ourselves (mind) down and listen to what our inner self is directing us to do.